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Aurelia's Fury saw a tiny bit of play but was just too clunky to be useful in the way you want a spell like that to be

You'll still be subjected to a coin-flip on every Stitch you cast or copy, but you're bound to win a few flips if you just cast the card enough times

Unlike its vampiric friend, Cutthroat doesn't count your opponents' creatures dying

It's weird animation, I agree, but do you want Craterhoof Behemoth back from the dead in your mono-green stomp deck

Speaking of which, Slifer should also have its own Continuous Spell that grants its controller an infinite hand size and forces them to draw each time a monster is Special Summoned from a Graveyard

This card is so hot right now that you can feel the heat coming off Charizard's flamethrower attack